Change & Growth

Been doing a lot of thinking this weekend… Today it was about my friends here.

They’re all special in their own way but I don’t think we’re on the same page. I want to move forward & succeed & they seem content to wallow where they are. Well, they complain about their situations but they don’t do anything to improve them.

Even before my Master came into my life, I wasn’t content to wallow – I’ve always tried to improve my situation. The decisions I have made haven’t always had the best results but I thought they were the best at the time. I have learnt many lessons because of this.

I know that my decision to submit to my Master is a good one – I see the change in myself & it’s for the better. I am definitely more determined to succeed and, in making Him proud, I’ll be bettering myself.

I have a telephonic interview for a really good job tomorrow morning & while I am a little nervous, I am trying to stay as positive as possible. This job would be perfect for me to sort my life out & make a completely fresh start. I’d have to thank my Master because He’s the one who has taught me to be more positive.

I can’t wait to live the rest of my life in service to Him as I know I can only flourish under His care…

Enthralled

I haven’t really had the most productive of days today but I have spent a lot of time thinking about how I feel about my Master…

I simply cannot get enough of Him, the mere thought of Him sends my heart racing. I guess some might say I am obsessed or perhaps addicted but those are such negative words. I think rather that I am completely enthralled & captivated by the amazing person that He is & all the incredible experiences I have had in the short time of His ownership.

I’m more confident in myself, knowing that I am important to Him. That someone like Him has confidence in me is an incredible thought to me… I’m going to do the utmost best to ensure that He never feels the need to question it!

Belonging

It has been a while since I wrote anything so this could be quite a lengthy one – so much has happened in the time that has passed, the best of it being that I finally met my Master!

He is all that I imagined & so much more… The few days that I spent with Him have shown me what true gentleman, a proper man, should be. While everyone in my past had their good qualities, none have ever made me feel like He does. I have never been made to feel that I belong anywhere but I now know that I belong with Him, at His feet, ready to please Him in all I do. He has always told me that I belong with Him but to actually experience it physically & know that it is all very real is amazing.

I have my collar now & wear it with pride! Master told me that I can wear it around my wrist during the day at work but I wore it properly – I’ll only wear it on my wrist if I feel it’s absolutely necessary. It’s already a part of who I am & I am comfortable in it.

I am even wearing the bruises from our play-time with pride & I’m sad to see them fading… I look forward to when I will be the recipient of more!

I haven’t had any luck on the job front yet, unfortunately, but I refuse to give up. I sent my CV off to a number of different places again today & had a pretty positive conversation with the owner of one place in Randburg so I’ve got my fingers & toes crossed that he’ll get back to me once he’s had a look at my CV. I’m just going to keep on trying & trying because it WILL happen!

Coming back here wasn’t easy – I did NOT want to leave but I guess there’s always some we don’t want to do that we have to… I have my Master & I’m happy in the knowledge that He cares for me even if we are miles apart. Soon, there will be no distance & I will be at His feet – mind, body, heart & soul, right where I belong…